Yesterday we closed Roald Dahl’s Matilda: The Musical. It has been such a labor of love and I can’t believe it’s over. We hit the ground running from day one and that meant it was a lot of long days and chaotic moments. Even with the tight turn around, I found so much joy and play in this process. This is the largest cast I’ve been a part of in my time at UMW Theatre and I am so lucky to have had such a strong group of people to lean on throughout this process. I’ve made so many new friends and new connections and I’ve also strengthened others. That’s one of the things I love about theater, it brings people together. Matilda has so much joy and childlike whimsy and to tell that story the actors have to embrace that joy. So, even when the work was hard or I was tired, there was someone to raise my energy and remind me of the joy.
As a performer I’ve been learning so much about myself this semester and this show really helped me on that journey. This semester, I’ve started to let go a little bit. I have a tendency to micromanage everything I do and that bleeds into my acting. I really struggle with being able to let go and be free, but recently I’ve had a change of heart when it comes to performing. In my voice and body movement class, we’re encouraged to break free from the habitual patterns that we tend to fall into. Something about that has really been sticking with me and I’ve been trying to embody that.
That’s something I really worked on this semester. I’ve been trying to let go and just go with the flow as much as possible. In class and in rehearsals I’ve focused on breaking from the habitual patterns that I found myself falling into. Through that, I started to play more in rehearsal and embrace the changes that came to me during the process. The childlike joy that I’ve found backstage also comes to life on the stage. While Mrs. Phelps isn’t a child, she has just as much joy in her heart as any of the children in the show. That presented a fun challenge for me to work through and gave me ample opportunities to be silly.
I’ve had so many opportunities to engage with members of the audience with this show. Elderstudy, Afterwords, and the sensory friendly performance all had their unique challenges, but I really loved getting to meet that much of the audience. This show has so much community in it. The kids at Crunchem Hall form a community and we created a large and beautiful community within the company. There’s also a community made between the actors and the audience. Onstage, we are having a conversation with the audience about the story, so experiences like this gave me a chance to have those conversations with audience members more closely.
Honestly, these past few weeks navigating my health has been pretty difficult for me. I haven’t been sick often in the past few years, so being sick multiple times during this process was new for me. I also had to fight the urge to let the micromanaging come back because I was sick and wanted everything else to go “my way.” I didn’t want to admit that I was feeling badly and thought about taking it out of my journals altogether, but it was a condition I struggled with. So, I felt like it was only fair of me to share that part of this journey. I’m finally feeling better and I’m glad I was able to take care of myself in the ways I needed to, but it was definitely something that was a struggle for me.
Since my first day as a theatre major, I’ve become more confident with myself and my ability to tell a story. I’ve also become more comfortable being silly and open with others onstage. Acting is a generous act, as an actor has to give to their scene partners and the audience and being a theatre major has taught me how to be generous. This show was a culmination of my time here. Onstage and off I was able to give and receive whimsy and find the lightness in every moment. Matilda is a little girl with a big heart and a story to tell, just like I was. I’m so grateful to have had the chance to share that story with other little kids. I hope that I sparked someone’s love of theatre and reading. I’m so grateful for all the opportunities my time here has presented me and I can’t wait to see what’s next. All my love.
